Too many people convince themselves that they “can’t speak in front of large crowds.â€
Baloney!
If you can have one interesting conversation with one person, then you already possess all the skills you need to give a keynote address before a thousand people. The beauty of large crowds is that you have numbers working in your favor, whether you are seeking new contacts, more prospects, increased sales or just additional attention.
Many people like to fool themselves into thinking that they can’t give formal presentation or that they can “give a speech.†But what is a speech? In my book, it’s anytime you open your mouth to communicate a message to one or more people.
So giving a “speech†is not just a politician advocating a tax cut or a tax increase in a 30-minute appeal to congress. A speech can be as simple as a baby screaming for “mama!†or “bottle.â€
Psychological research has shown that in any meeting between two people, one person often establishes the dominant position while another person assumes the submissive role. The submissive person begins to mimic the dominant person in terms of speaking speed, volume, style, and even breathing patterns. In many situations involving conversations with clients, customers and bosses, this pattern can work well for everyone involved.
But not with the news media!
The first thing the average embattled politician or corporate executive does to prepare for a media interview or press conference is to brainstorm with their staff of all of the possible questions reporters might ask. This process might take hours or even days.
And it is a complete waste of time!
I’m not saying that questions don’t matter; they do. People think that media consultants like me tell our clients to ignore the questions completely and just to say whatever the prepared message is. No, that’s not the strategy either.
In general, I find it distasteful when speakers are needlessly confrontational or aggressive with audiences. I err on the side of trying to be polite and respectful with audiences.
However, there are a few exceptions. For example, if you are a teacher or trainer and you will be in front of the same audience on a regular basis for many weeks, you may wish to confront rude behavior on the part of an audience member.
I have one vivid memory of when my Freshman year political science professor at Duke University, Dr. Kornberg, walked up to a student who was reading a paper during class (the class had 150 students).
There are many different styles of effective communication, but arguing with someone is typically the worst possible way to attempt to communicate. Once you enter the mode of arguing, listening shuts down—by everyone in the argument.
Now, I’m the first one to admit it, I like arguing. In fact, for many years I was a TV and radio talk show host with a focus on politics. So yes, I argued for hours everyday. And I listened to a lot of people yelling and screaming at me on the air.
Here is a concern I often hear when I am teaching clients how to control their quotes and sound bites during an interview:
“TJ, I understand when you say that reporters are suckers for clichés, analogies and pop culture references, but won’t the reporter think I sound cheesy if I use these sorts of obvious gimmicks to get quoted? Won’t I seem like I’m trying too hard?â€
This is a common question I get and there is some legitimacy to the concern. Of course there is always the chance that you could package your message in a sound bite that is too cute or that just doesn’t do it for the reporter. What’s the worst thing that can happen?
The latest trend among politicians running for President of the United States is to announce their candidacy by using video on their websites.
Here are the advantages:
No questions have to be taken. If you announce at a public event, reporters can come and ask you pesky questions that can knock your intended message off of the front pages i.e. “Presidential candidate TJ Walker conceded yesterday that he cheated at tic-tac-toe as a kindergartner!â€
Here’s a standard piece of presentation advice I often hear:
“Find a few friendly faces in your audience and look at them—this will calm your nerves.â€
This advice is true, as far as it goes. But here’s the problem: if you keep looking at just the friendly faces through your presentation, then all of the blank, bored, and unfriendly faces feel progressively more left out, and consequently more bored.
Now you have a situation that is spiraling out of control—only it’s supposed to be OK because you feel more comfortable?